Shadow work is a term you might not hear often, but it can have a big impact on your life. It’s about getting to know the parts of yourself that you usually keep hidden or don’t like to talk about. The idea comes from the psychologist Carl Jung, who believed that everyone has a “shadow” – the side of our personality that we may not even know is there. In this blog, we’ll dive into what shadow work is, why it’s important, and how it can help you grow.
The shadow is made up of the parts of ourselves that we try to hide or ignore. These can be things like anger, jealousy, fears, insecurities, or even parts of our personality we’ve been taught are “bad” or “wrong.” For example, maybe as a kid, you were told not to be selfish, so now you push down any feelings that seem selfish. But those feelings are still part of you, and when you ignore them, they can show up in ways you don’t expect.
Think of the shadow as a closet you keep stuffing things into. If you keep shoving things in without organizing or cleaning them out, eventually they will overflow and create a mess. Shadow work is like opening that closet, sorting through everything, and deciding what to do with it. It’s not always easy, but it’s necessary if you want to live a fuller, more balanced life.
Understanding Yourself Better
Shadow work helps you see the parts of yourself that you’ve been ignoring. When you’re more aware of your shadow, you start to understand why you act or feel certain ways. For example, maybe you find yourself getting upset when people don’t listen to you. Shadow work might reveal that this anger comes from a time when you felt unheard as a child. By understanding this, you can start to work on healing that part of yourself and respond to situations in a healthier way.
Improving Your Relationships
Often, our shadows affect how we treat others. If we don’t deal with our hidden feelings, they can come out in harmful ways. You might get jealous of a friend’s success and not even realize why. Shadow work can help you recognize these feelings before they cause problems. Once you know what’s going on inside, you can communicate better and build stronger relationships.
Reducing Stress and Anxiety
Ignoring your shadow doesn’t make it go away. In fact, it can build up and cause emotional problems like stress, anxiety, or even depression. Imagine carrying around a backpack full of heavy rocks that you can’t see. That’s what it feels like when you’re holding onto unprocessed feelings. Shadow work helps you take those rocks out of the backpack, one by one, so you don’t feel so weighed down.
Personal Growth
Working on your shadow allows you to grow in ways you didn’t think were possible. When you accept and understand all parts of yourself, even the “ugly” parts, you become more whole. This can lead to more confidence, self-compassion, and a greater sense of peace. You’re no longer battling yourself, but working with all aspects of who you are.
Shadow work doesn’t have to be scary or overwhelming. It’s a process that can happen slowly, over time. Here are some simple steps to get started:
Journaling
Writing down your thoughts and feelings is a great way to explore your shadow. Try asking yourself questions like, “What parts of myself do I tend to hide from others?” or “When do I feel most triggered, and why?” Be honest with your answers and don’t judge yourself. The goal is to uncover what’s going on inside, not to criticize yourself for having those feelings.
Pay Attention to Triggers
Triggers are things that make you react strongly, usually in a negative way. For example, if someone says something that really upsets you, that’s a trigger. Instead of just getting angry, take a step back and ask yourself why it bothered you so much. Often, triggers point to parts of our shadow that need attention.
Practice Self-Compassion
Shadow work can bring up difficult emotions, so it’s important to be kind to yourself. Remember, everyone has a shadow – it doesn’t make you a bad person. Treat yourself the way you would treat a friend who’s going through a tough time.
Seek Help When Needed
Sometimes, shadow work can bring up really deep or painful feelings. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it can help to talk to a therapist or counselor. They can guide you through the process in a safe way and help you deal with anything that feels too big to handle on your own.
Shadow work is a powerful tool for personal growth. It helps you get to know yourself on a deeper level and can improve your mental and emotional well-being. By facing your shadow, you can learn to accept all parts of yourself, not just the ones that seem “good” or “acceptable.” In doing so, you become more balanced, more compassionate, and more at peace with who you are.
So, take a deep breath and start opening that closet. You might be surprised by what you find, and even more surprised by how much lighter you feel once you’ve done the work.
May you be filled with God's love and blessings today.
Reverend Bill McBride